53 pages • 1 hour read
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Content Warning: This section includes discussions of drug abuse and death by suicide.
Cleo is a 24-year-old artist from England. At the beginning of the novel, she’s in a difficult situation: She makes very little money, is about to lose her student visa, and can’t go back to England because the only family she still has is her estranged father. When she meets Frank, what starts out as a passionate fling turns into true love and a convenient marriage. Cleo is so in love with Frank and so secure under his financial care that she thinks she’s happy enough to come off her antidepressants.
Cleo’s battle with depression is a constant struggle, and she feels shame about her condition. Her depression connects her to her mother, who died by suicide and whose death haunts her. Her depression returns when she stops taking her antidepressants, and is enhanced when conflict arises between her and Frank. She works less and less on her art, which compounds her depression. Cleo finds herself in a nasty cycle. She wonders if the reason why men she’s loved, like Anders and Frank, can’t be fully present for her is because she’s not worthy of love. From Cleo’s