Mary

Content Warning: This section discusses sexual assault, child abuse, violence, and murder. Stigmatizing language about mental health is reproduced in quotations only.

Protagonist Mary was born in Arroyo at the same moment that serial killer Damon Cross died; as a result, his soul ended up in her body. After her parents died in a fire, she lived with her aunt Nadine until her mental illness led to a stay in Clearview, an abusive psychiatric institution. There, Mary became obsessed with being good; her stay also resulted in hypersensitivity to anyone calling her “crazy,” which she believes is “the worst word you can call a woman. No other C-word comes close” (22).

At the novel’s beginning, Mary is turning 50 and experiencing the beginning of perimenopause. On the surface, it appears that Mary values her independence and self-sufficiency. However, Mary is deeply resentful of the fact that she is invisible to most of the world. When her manager fires her for being too old, he reveals that even this is an oversight: “He was supposed to fire you two weeks ago, but he forgot. He didn’t notice you were there. Like you don’t even exist” (27). The experience of being ignored gives Mary empathy for other middle-aged women, especially Damon’s victims.