The Nanny Diaries

The Nanny Diaries (2003) is a semi-autobiographical novel co-written by former nannies Emma McLaughlin and Nicola Kraus. Anecdotal and chaotic in its narrative structure, the book is a satire that observes the absurdities of upper-class Manhattan social life through the subject of difficult, wealthy parents and their strange and dysfunctional relationships with their children.

The Nanny Diaries begins with a model of the archetypal Manhattan family with a nanny, comprising rich parents, neglected, rude children, and an overworked caregiver keeping the gears turning behind the scenes. McLaughlin and Kraus describe the opulent decor of the typical affluent home—having collectively been nannies in more than thirty of them—as well as the fad therapies and various pretensions of Manhattanites striving to climb their social ladders. The authors assert that the children suffer at the hands of these various alienating behaviors.



The book’s fictional protagonist, simply called Nanny, is a child development major at NYU who naively accepts a job as a nanny after an encounter with a woman in Central Park. Mrs. X, an ostensibly perfect “Park Avenue princess,” hires Nanny to take care of her four-year-old son, Grayer, handing her a long list of rules for her initiation. Among the rules, she learns things such as that Grayer is scarcely allowed to play inside their opulent home or eat anything that contains refined flour. Mr. X, her husband, is an absent powerful investment banker. Meanwhile, Mrs. X is too occupied with a social committee role and frequent salon appointments, as well as tracking down the infidelities and legal transgressions of her husband, to act as a mother.

Grayer is a difficult child to handle, though Nanny manages him using her experience getting along with kids and her own chaotic family. One day early on, Mrs. X requires Nanny to dress up as a Teletubby to entertain at Mr. X’s office party. During the party, Grayer walks in on Mr. X in a darkened office with a woman and innocently recalls that she was not wearing any pants. Around the same time, Mrs. X figures out about his infidelity, coaxing the confirmation out of Nanny.

Another day, Grayer becomes ill, and Mrs. X, away at a spa, refuses to be disturbed for any reason. Nanny’s mother helps diagnose Grayer with the croup, saving the day. Mrs. X deals out a multitude of other slights against Nanny. For example, despite being horribly paid and hoping for an expensive Christmas present for taking care of Grayer so well, she is crestfallen to receive a pair of earmuffs.



Nanny’s experience at the X household is punctuated by a crush she encounters frequently in an elevator, whom she calls the “Harvard hottie.” She shares details of the crush, along with the outrageous stories and problems of her work, with her friends as a kind of therapy. She ruminates openly about ambiguous moral situations she is thrown into; for example, whether or not to tell Mrs. X about finding Mr. X’s mistress’s underwear. She is shocked at how simply being a decent human to Grayer enamors and comforts him. Despite being called at all hours of the day and night, having to do the most menial chores, and facing constant criticism for imaginary errors, Nanny endures as long as possible. She is surprised to find that she has developed affection for Grayer as well, pitying him for mainly being treated as Mrs. X’s accessory. Nanny also develops a sympathetic relationship with another nanny, an immigrant from San Salvador who, because of her status, can only find low-paying jobs as nannies for Manhattan families.

Near the end of the book, Mrs. X is agitated and unsympathetic about Nanny needing to attend her NYU graduation because it conflicts with the first day of their family vacation to Nantucket. In Nantucket, Nanny reaches her final straw when she overhears Mrs. X talking about a nanny cam she has installed in a teddy bear. Mr. X abruptly tries to leave, but Mrs. X forces him to stay by inviting his mother to Nantucket. The next day, Mr. X is caught with his arm around another woman at a barbecue. Furious, Mrs. X announces that she is pregnant. Nanny is asked to leave after an argument with Mrs. X about her fidelity to Grayer, having requested to go back to New York to deal with being kicked out of her apartment. Angry, she reveals that Mr. X’s love interest has been in their home. Grayer wakes up as Nanny is pushed out the door. Nanny returns to the X’s apartment and quits by taping a note to the stuffed bear, returning her keys.

Despite their unrelenting criticisms of the behaviors and attitudes of Mr. and Mrs. X, McLaughlin and Kraus sympathize strongly with the children of absent Manhattan parents, and even partially humanize the parents, documenting the occasional display of kindness or affection. Semi-autobiographical and exposing, the book presents an absurd satire on the trivialities of affluent urban life, the fruitlessness of social climbing, and the poverty of real human connections experienced by families that fixate on status above all else.



Sources:

https://moly.hu/konyvek/emma-mclaughlin-nicola-kraus-the-nanny-diaries

http://gothamist.com/2004/12/23/nicola_kraus_and_emma_mclaughlin_citizen_girl_and_the_nanny_diaries_authors.php